the grace of hiddenness

I woke up this morning, like every other morning.  I met the sunrise in His eyes. Snuggled under my covers, greeted the day.  My first chapter of a new book ready to send in for review, lunch with a friend, time to wash my hair: a simple ordinary day. But what joy.

It is so easy to tell you about my life.  Read the archives of my days in recent posts. It is so easy to give you ministry updates and reports.  But that is not really what I wanted for this space.  Surely they too will be here.  But I want this to be a place that creates space for encounter as we journey along the unpaved road into His heart together.

So with seasons and years having changed, I am reminding myself again of why I write.  It is not to merely inform the world of what is happening here in a news log alone.  Somehow busyness managed to reduce my writing to technicalities without my permission or notice.  Taking a day away in stillness, I have managed to find my voice again.  It’s one of those holy paradoxes.  I most easily find my voice in silence.

This poetic, descriptive inner core of mine that craves beauty.  When all is silent and 100 sleeping treasures lie tucked in at night, it is what compels me to stand in my yard, brave the mosquitoes, and marvel at the diamond promises hanging in our sky. I am not a practical writer.  Not at my deepest levels.  Poetry flows through my veins and I have not been allowing it out nearly enough.

So here I am to share heartbeat and hunger, to embrace a creative flow of lines and swirls that communicate the stirrings deep inside my soul.   Shared journeys are gifts of grace in a sometimes solitary world.  Again it is an honor to share mine with you.

There is a hunger in my heart for hiddenness today.  To hide away in Him.  I don’t replenish in crowds or even small groups.  My strength renews itself in my times alone.  Times to be, to create, to breathe, to enjoy silence, to reflect.

Part of me longs for a quietness counter-cultural to the noise of our overly connected world. It is too easy to become fully accessible to everyone everywhere and fully present to no one at all.  I want to live fully present to Him and fully present to the people He puts in my path.  Love is fully present to the gift of now.

You might notice the comments are no longer on.  I still want to hear from you.  I do. You can always write me on the connect page.  I cherish your feedback and I read everything you send me.  Please keep sending your comments there.  It is so much more personal that way.

In writing this next book, I feel like I am on a journey to rediscover my roots.  Roots planted in stillness, reaching deep into the hidden depths of His heart.  I will share more about that in the days ahead.  In the mean while, I’d like to recommend a friend’s post that recently was cool water to my spirit on a hot afternoon: Unknown Paths by Justin Abraham

For now I will sign off with a quote from chapter one of Encountering Heaven, my newest project:

“I am very simple.  I see life in metaphor and analogy.  I meet Jesus in small grimy fingers weaving their way into mine and in little eyes that twinkle and laugh.  I meet Him in butterfly chases, pre-dawn blankets of silence and diamond-studded canopies at night that steal my breath away. I meet Him in the everyday grace of ordinary life as much as I do in revelatory encounters and miracles.  Neither to me is more holy.  Both are utterly supernatural.  I want everything He desires to give.”

Selah.  Today may you too find everything He desires to give.